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The Adventures of Miles Cowperthwaite

02 Wednesday Jan 2013

Posted by deviant wench in BDSM, Humor, Kink, Saturday Night Live

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

B&D, BDSM, Domination, Erotic spanking, Flogging, In the Navy..., Kink, Kinky, Michael Palin, Naval Tradition, Nipples, Punishment, Sailor, Saturday Night Live, Sex, SNL, Spank, WIITWD

Just because it makes me laugh. 😀

Saturday Night Live Transcripts S4E18

The Adventures of Miles Cowperthwaite

Fred Silverman…..John Belushi

[ open on graphic: “Family Classics” ]

Announcer: Tonight: “Family Classics” continues its second season, with Part II of the new Dickins novel Miles Cowperthwaite.

[ dissolve to copy of book resting on tabletop ]

Miles Cowperthwaite, by Charles Dickins. As told to Robert Louis Stevenson and Rafael Salbatini.

[ hand turns book to first page ]

Miles Cowperthwaite V/O: “The wretched birth, miserable childhood, agonizingly painful adolescence, and appallingly vile and degrading death of Miles Cowperthwaite.

[ turns page to Chapter Two ]

Chapter Two: ‘I Am Nailed To The Hull’.

“It having been determined by my benefactor that a term of service at sea would make a man, I accordingly left Pinckley Hall in the company of Captain Ned, and put out from Bristol aboard his ship The Raging Queen.

Captain Ned, I learned from my shipmates, was a very manly, virile, manful person, and a firm believer in strict discipline, corporal punishment, and nude apartment wrestling. How truly strict he was, I learned on our first day out of port, when out First Mate called all hands on deck for an important annoucement.”

[ dissolve onto scenes aboard The Raging Queen ]

[ First Mate Spunk rings the deck bell ]

First Mate Spunk: Alright, please, everybody, please! Welcome aboard The Raging Queen! Now, of course, I can’t possibly introduce everybody, so you’re just going to have to wear your little name tags. And if that’s the worst thing you’ll wear on this voyage, you’re lucky. Now, before I introduce Captain Ned, there’s some quiche over here, some salad, and some banana bread in the bowl, and there should be a brie around, if someone hasn’t eaten it. And now, here is our own Captain Ned!

[ Captain Ned steps up ]

Captain Ned: Thank you, Mr. Spunk. Gentlemen, we have on board a young man whose name is Miles Cowperthwaite! And I have promised his guardian to teach him the man’s life at sea! To show him man’s ports, such as Key West and San Fransisco! I expect him to be treated manfully! Well, Miles, have you anything to say?

Miles Cowperthwaite: [ stsnds, cheerful ] Well.. I’m very grateful for this opportunity, Captain Ned! Up ’til now, my life has been the most degrading, pathetic, soul-destroying, humiliating, awful grovel..

Captain Ned: [ interrupting ] That’s enough, Miles.. [ Miles sits ] Now, men, I run a mans’ ship. I will run it in a manful and masculine way! I will tolerate no men under my command who act in such a way so as to discredit their manhood and manliness! Do I make myself clear?

First Mate Spunk: Three cheer for Captain Ned!

[ the men cheer ]

Miles Cowperthwaite V/O: “If there were any doubts as to Captain Ned’s severity, they were quickly dispelled that very afternoon, when a scuffle broke out on deck.”

[ Spunk approaches a Sailor tanning ]

First Mate Spunk: That’s my tanning spot! you! You’re in my spot! That’s my spot!

Sailor #1: You are daft! I’ve been here all morning. Now, run along, you are blocking my sun.

First Mate Spunk: Don’t you give me any back-sass, you tan tease!

[ fight breaks out; Captain Ned intervenes ]

Captain Ned: Is this how men act on a man’s ship? Where is your manliness? Fighting on deck is a serious breach on my articles of strict discipline! I’m afraid the guilty party is in for a very severe punishment!

Sailor #1: Captain.. I did indeed take Mr. Spunk’s spot. I’m ready to accept my punishment..

First Mate Spunk: Captain! I threw the first blow. If anyone is to be punished, let it be me. I ask only that whatever you do, please don’t put me in a tight-fitting Lassie costume and make me eat from a monogrammed dog dish.

Sailor #2: [ entering ] Captain, I encouraged this fight – punish me! Make me wear nipple-pinching clothespins, sir!

Sailor #3: [ entering ] Me, Captain! Punish me!

Captain Ned: Stop! I’ve heard enough! Your manly admission of guilt is most manful. However, as your Captain, it is I who must bear the full masculine responsibility! And therefore, I will be punished. Spunk! Take me alone! I want a boiling oil rub..

[ Spunk drags Captain below decks for his punishment ]

Miles Cowperthwaite V/O: “Having had no seafaring experience, I was surprised at how different the life of a sailor was from what I had imagined. Our day began at dawn, where, after a hearty breakfast, we had punishment ’til lunchtime. After lunch, there was more punishment ’til dinner. After dinner, we would pull up anchor and sail for an hour, then drop anchor again for soem verbal humiliation, followed by evening punishment. I imagine that the crew is quite used to it, for in all my rounds with the ship surgeon, Dr. Pierce, I never once heard a man complain.”

[ Miles follows Dr. Pierce during one of his rounds ]

Miles Cowperthwaite: Sir? I was thinking, wouldn’t we make better progress if we was under sail 14 hours a day, and had punishment only two hours a day, instead of the other way ’round?

Dr. Pierce: Miles, my boy, you have much to learn. Wihout strict discipline, we’d have mutiny on this ship.

Miles Cowperthwaite: Oh.

Dr. Pierce: [ examines his patient’s knee ] Let’s see. Ooh.. I don’t like the looks of that leg, Mr. Tarvox. I’m afraid we’ll have to take it off.

Mr. Tarvox: Really?

Dr. Pierce: Yes, I’m afraid so. And probably the arm, as well.

Miles Cowperthwaite: [ confused ] The arm?! Why the arm, Doctor?

Dr. Pierce: Well, to get the leg. Look. It’s rather in the way, see? [ indicates Tarvox’s arm resting on his leg ]

Miles Cowperthwaite: Why can’t he hold the arm out of the way.

Dr. Pierce: Well, that’s.. fine.. if you’d rather do that.

Mr. Tarvox: Yes, sir. Please.

Dr. Pierce: Okay. Now, don’t worry, Mr. Tarvox, you won’t feel a thing. You’ll wake up, and they’ll be gone.

Mr. Tarvox: They?

Dr. Pierce: It. It’ll be gone. Uh.. I guarantee you won’t know which one is missing.

Mr. Tarvox: Oh.

Dr. Pierce: Any preferences? [ Tarvox gives a strange look ] Good. Good. Okay, we’ll take the.. the..

Miles Cowperthwaite: Leg.

Dr. Pierce: ..leg.. off on Thursday, okay? First thing. You’ll be fine. You’ll be fine.. [ walks off to have a drink ]

Miles Cowperthwaite V/O: “Perhaps this isn’t the routine of an ordinary sailor: floggings, stockings, key haulings, kneeling on our knuckles, having things dropped on our heads, being pushed down stairs, and so on. But occasionally, there would be time for activities such as steering the ship, and trying to make the sails fill up with wind. Captain Ned took a warm, personal interest in my welfare, and if a night was stormy, or even mildy choppy, he would ocme to my cabin to comfort me.”

[ Captain Ned enters Miles’ room as he prays beside his bed ]

Miles Cowperthwaite: Oh. Captain Ned.

Captain Ned: [ grinning ] Hello, Miles. Uh.. I was worried that you might be.. “frightened” by the masty weather.. [ unbuttons the top of his pajamas ]

Miles Cowperthwaite: But, Captain Ned, sir, it is perfectly calm tonight!

Captain Ned: Just so.. with the stormy weather we’ve been having lately, I was afraid this.. sudden calm might alarm you. Because I’ve seen grown men – manly men, in the full pride of their mahood, grow white with terror on serene, tranquil nights as this!

Miles Cowperthwaite: Oh, that is very kind of you, sir.. [ chuckles nervously ]

[ Captain Ned blows out the candle besides Miles’ bed, leaving the room in total darkness ]

Miles Cowperthwaite V/O: “So dangerously flaccid did that night become, thus Captain Ned remained in my cabin to reassure me until dawn, when we were aroused by a shout from Mr. Spunk..”

First Mate Spunk: [ peering through telescope ] Land ahoy! Land ahoy! Oh, my God, I don’t know.. oh, it might be land, maybe it’s another boat.. Oh, daft, it might me a cloud! No, I can’t tell, this damn thing is torturing me. Oh, maybe it’s a cloud, I’m not sure, oh dear!

Captain Ned: [ walking up ] Mr. Spunk! Have you spied land?

First Mate Spunk: I’m not sure! Somebody else get up here and look! If I say it’s land, and we make for it and it’s not, I’ll get yelled for it!

Captain Ned: Alright! [ peers through telescope ]

Miles Cowperthwaite V/O: “What Mr. Spunk had sighted was not land at all, but a small, open boat. Which, upon closer inspection, was found to contain two remarkable passengers.”

[ two women climb onboard The Raging Queen ]

Captain Ned: [ greeting them ] I am Captain Ned, of The Raging Queen! Tell me.. are there any males with you?

Madeline Warrington: No. Just my sister and I.

Ruth Warrington: Yes. My name is Ruth Warrington. This is my sister Madeline. We were crossing the West Indies, when pirates seized our ship. They took our entire crew prisoners.

Captain Ned: [ thinking ] Hmm.. Uh.. can you tell me, were these pirates manly and verile?

Madeline Warrington: They were contemptible animals, who subjected our ship’s crew to the most unspeakable torture!

First Mate Spunk: Do you suppose these pirates might still be anywhere in the area.

Ruth Warrington: Yes. I’m afraid they may yet be very close..

Captain Ned: I see. [ runs to address his crew ] Men! There are pirates in these waters! Pirates who inflict hideous punishment to those who fall into their hands! [ crew oohs ] Now, we can turn tail and run. Or, we can take the many course, that which our manhood demands! Find these despots of discipline, and comfort them! What is your answer!!

Crew: Find the pirates!!

Captain Ned: So it will be done! Stand by to incur the waters!

[ crew wave out to see, in search of the pirates ]

Miles Cowperthwaite V/O: “Despite six months spent in the endevour, our search for the pirates proved unsuccessful. And so at length we put into port at Key West, where we took on a supply of omelet pans and did the costumes for a production of ‘Take Her, She’s Mine’. These were pleasant times. With Captain Ned ashore buying melons, discipline was less severe, and his trips to my cabin to comfort me less frequent. One night, however, as I lay in bed writing a letter to Lord Pinckley, I heard an unfamilair knock at my door.”

[ a knock at the door ]

Miles Cowperthwaite: Come in?

[ the Warrington sisters enter ]

Ruth Warrington: Hello, Miles. We came to see if you were alright.

Miles Cowperthwaite: Oh.

Madeline Warrington: Yes. We were worried that the cool sea air, combined with the saltiness of the spray, and the closeness of ships in the harbor might have alarmed you.

Miles Cowperthwaite: Oh. Well, that’s very kind of you, but I’m not frightened! Are you alright?

Ruth Warrington: Well.. these past six months at sea aboard The Raging Queen have been somewhat frightening.

Miles Cowperthwaite: Begging your pardon, ma’am.. but have any of the men on board.. well.. tried to take liberties with you.

Madeline Warrington: No. No, not really.

Ruth Warrington: No. We haven’t been harmed at all.

Miles Cowperthwaite: [ happy ] Oh! Well, ma’am, I suspect that’s due to the discipline Captain Ned employs on this ship! For this crew is an unsavory lot!

Madeline Warrington: Yes, I suspect so. [ removing clothes ] Hey, Miles, it is terribly hot in here!

Ruth Warrington: Isn’t it, Madeline? [ removes her clothes as well ]

Miles Cowperthwaite: Oh, it’s alright for me!

Madeline Warrington: Perhaps we can comfort you, then, Miles?

[ Captain Ned enters; the girls jump up ]

Captain Ned: Hello, Miles.

Miles Cowperthwaite: Oh! Captain Ned!

Captain Ned: Hello, Miss Warrington. Miss Warrington. Miles, I hurried back, as, uh.. I was afraid that the excitement of the last several months at sea, combined with the change of seasons might have alarmed you.

Miles Cowperthwaite: Oh, that’s very kind of you, Captain..

Ruth Warrington: Excuse me, Captain, but we were comforting Miles.

Madeline Warrington: Wait! Perhaps we can all comfort Miles!

[ a look of distress falls upon Miles’ face ]

Captain Ned: Very well. I see nothing unmanly in that.

[ the three of them undress and climb into Miles’ bed ]

Miles Cowperthwaite V/O: “Of all that I have suffered since going to sea, nothing could compare to the constant comforting of Captain Ned and the Warrington sisters. And I resolved to escape from The Raging Queen at the first opportunity.” ]

[ show Miles walking across the ship in disguise ]

“One night, while the crew was below doing exercises to flatten their stomachs, I stole the Second Mate’s coat, collected my few belongings, and lowered myself over the mast.”

[ Miles jumps overboard ]

“A war took place after I hit the water. I have very little recollection. I was evidently quite ill for a very long time, and the next thing I remember seeing was the friendly face of Dr. Pierce.”

Dr. Pierce: He’s coming around..

Ruth Warrington: Oh, thank God!

Miles Cowperthwaite: [ dazed ] Where am I?

Madeline Warrington: You’re back on board The Raging Queen, Miles.

Dr. Pierce: Yes. You were very lucky. One of the crew saw you fall overboard.

Ruth Warrington: Captain Ned will be so relieved. He’s been with you every moment, Miles.. comforting you.

Dr. Pierce: Well, Miles, I suspect you’ll be strong enough to go under the knife in a couple of days, huh?

Miles Cowperthwaite: [ worried ] What?! What do you mean, Dr. Pierce?!

Dr. Pierce: The legs, Miles. I’m afraid they’ll have to come off. Now, I’ve only got one pegleg aboard, but I can get you a nice hook for the bottom of this left knee. As soon as we reach port, we’ll go shopping for a nice wooden one.

Miles Cowperthwaite: But, sir! Must I lose my legs?

Dr. Pierce: I’m afriad so, Miles. When we pulled you out of the water, your legs were.. soaking wet.

Miles Cowperthwaite V/O: From the moment I learned that Dr. Pierce has designs on my legs, I decided to repeat my attempt at escape whatever the risk involved.

[ show Miles sneaking across the ship in disguise ]

The very next morning, after one final night of comforting from Captain Ned, I once more stowed out of my cabin and lowered myself over the side, this time completely undetected.

[ Miles jumps overboard ]

And so my term of service at sea had come to an end. Once again, I found myself quite alone in the world, with little capitol and few prospects. Of the details of my escape from The Raging Queen, as well as my adventures subsequent thereto, the reader shall learn in my next chapter: ‘I Am Eaten By Sharks’.”

[ close ]

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And you may ask yourself, well, how did I get here?

20 Thursday Sep 2012

Posted by deviant wench in BDSM, Google, Search terms

≈ 15 Comments

Tags

B&D, balls, Batman, BDSM, Bottom (BDSM), Breast, Clitoris, cock, Collar, Cunt, Dominance & Submission, Domination, ElectroStim, Erotic spanking, Flogging, Gitane Demone, Google, Jessica Rabbit, Kink, kneeling, Master, orgasm, ping pong paddle, pussy, Safeword, Scene Report, Spank, spanking bench, submission, Violet Wand, Weasels, ZAP

Google is my friend, sometimes, because it leads people to my blog with some of the most random search strings in the universe. 🙂

Oh, some of them are obvious, like BDSM, which probably gives people about 25 million hits but somehow, occasionally, leads them to me. And then there are the not-so-obvious, the funny, the odd, and the outright weird…

Herewith, some of my faves.

flogging the wench. (This reminds me of Jessica Rabbit shaking the weasels and therefor makes me LOL 😉 )

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zapping the clitoris

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ping pong paddle spanking (I hate that fucking ping pong paddle…)

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riding crop spanking.tumblr (tumblr? how’d a search for tumblr get to me??)

kink 1 pussy whipping (and at least 5 other different variations of pussy whipping)

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violet wand tickling

dont spank me (how on earth did that search phrase lead somebody to my blog?!?)

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bare butt

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i had 5 fingers in my cunt and 4 in my arse (WTF?? I’ve never even written “arse” on my blog. How did this lead to my blog??)

clit orgasm

real submission pussy spanking (as opposed to fake submission pussy spanking, I suppose…)

watch tease tingle naughty spank lick gspot (ooh, I like that one 🙂 )

tied to a spanking bench tumblr (another tumblr. WTF?)

clit twitching swelling throbbing aching (like that one too)

s&m spanky bench (I want a spanky bench!)

sunday night pussy

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fetlife seattle sunday night (?)

i like being restrained for a spanking (well, yes…)

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wench next door blog (apparently this is the blog where TDND and I team up….)

otk kink

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slaves in love bdsm melody (“slaves in love” would be a great title for a BDSM novel, don’t you think?)

domination submissiveness mdm/what is mdm domination and submissive (what IS mdm domination??) 

“domestic discipline”

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naughty erotic fantacy confessions (must…not…correct…spelling errors…in…search term…list…)

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“nipple orgasm “

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gitane demone spanking (gotta give props to anybody looking for gitane demone)

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jung bdsm arms reverse prayer (??? in what universe do these terms belong on the same string??)

tumblr b&d cunt (tumblr again)

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show women being sternly spanked with belt cane or paddle tumblr (tumblr again… and oddly specific!)

bdsm alfie dom daddy (Erm….huh?)

deep spot orgasm stories

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electrostim hawk

my master forcing his cock up my ass

thrumming nipples (Mmmmm….)

full-length erotic thrillers sex slavery

spanked kneeling with hard-on desk principal

And my very, absolute favorite to date: 

holy fucking butt cheeks  (bwahahahaha!!!)

 

😀

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A Spanking Meme

14 Saturday Jul 2012

Posted by deviant wench in B&D, BDSM, D/s, Kink, S&M, Sex

≈ 9 Comments

Tags

B&D, BDSM, breast spanking, Collar, Crop (implement), Cuffs, D/s, Domination, Erotic spanking, Implements of ass destruction, Kink, kneeling, Master/wench, OTK, pussy spanking, Relationships, Safeword, Sex, Spank, Spanking Meme, submission, you must tie her down on a bed and spank her!

I saw this meme on DD and D/S (Bella’s blog) and had to borrow it. Feel free to do the same! And put your link in the comments. 🙂

  1. Would you rather be spanked outside in a cold woodshed or inside by a cozy fire?
    Cozy fire, definitely.
  2. Would you rather be spanked in public or private?
    Private. Although I fantasize about a semi-private spanking: At a vanilla place, surreptitiously, so I have to hold in the yips and yowls; or at a private party with other like-minded individuals. Or in front of someone else during a threesome.
  3. Would you rather fantasize about spanking or actually be spanked?
    Why does it have to be one or the other?? I refuse to accept the false dichotomy! I want to fantasize about it and the I want Himself to actually spank me. 😀
  4. Would you rather be spanked for humiliation or for your spanker’s pleasure?
    His pleasure, mostly, to make him happy…but a little bit of “you’re a naughty girl” humiliation can be pretty hot.
  5. Would you rather be spanked by hand or hairbrush?
    HAND! I don’t like paddle-type instruments, or straps. Or shoehorns….well, maybe shoehorns a LITTLE. ::waggling eyebrows at Himself::
  6. Would you rather be spanked by belt or cane?
    Never had either. I don’t ever want to be hit with a belt, it scares me. I am mildly obsessed with canes though, even though I know they hurt like a sumbitch. I think he might be curious too, so that may happen some day…
  7. Would you rather be spanked by ping pong paddle or riding crop?
    He has spanked me with a ping-pong paddle, which I bought specifically for that purpose. I do not know what possessed me to give the fracking thing to him! After one particularly hot but long and extremely painful spanking session, I hid it. That was over a year ago…I think I may have thrown it away a few months ago when I was doing a deep-clean. So, I guess I’d have to go for riding crop. Unless it was one of those fur-covered ping-pong paddles, that would be yummy–it’s not the force I don’t like, it’s the sting.
  8. Would you rather be restrained or unrestrained during a spanking?
    I have a huge dilemma about restraints. I fucking love being restrained, knowing that I’m helpless and I CAN’T get away; OTOH, I love being obedient and staying in position for him, it makes me proud. What’s been happening recently is partial restraint (e.g. the chain from Sunday morning, or just my wrists), and/or putting on the collar and cuffs but not attaching them to anything (it puts me in that lovely restraint headspace and still lets me be an obedient wench and maintain position).
  9. Would you rather be spanked until you cried or until you are aroused?
    I’ve only cried two times that I can remember: Once last Sunday, when I thought he was actually mad at me; and once a few months ago, one of the first times I really submitted to the pain that he wanted to give, and then he sat by me and held my head in his lap and stroked my hair and I just bawled. I’m still not sure what that was about, but it was very cathartic. Arousal, OTOH, happens Every. Single. Time.
  10. Would you rather have just a red bottom or welts/bruises?
    I like having a red bottom, and having it be tender for a day or two. I want marks, though, even though I know it would require a lot more force (and therefore a lot more pain). I’ve had very light marks on my ass one time, and I was ridiculously proud of them. 😀
  11. Would you rather be spanked for the naughty things you have done or just because you enjoy the experience?
    The experience is really all we’ve done it for; we don’t really have protocol and so I don’t get “punished” per se (although if he wanted to do that, it would happen, because Rule #1 is that the Dom gets what the Dom wants). And it turns me on tremendously to know that HE enjoys the experience.
  12. Would you rather be spanked with panties up or panties down?
    I’ve never been spanked with panties up. The closest I’ve ever been to being clothes is wearing a corset. For a real spanking, anyway. He might give me a couple swats to get my attention or warn me about what I’m getting later when I’m undressed, but that’s it.
  13. Would you rather be spanked somewhat clothed or entirely naked?
    Naked. That way he can get at all my bits.
  14. Would you rather be spanked OTK or bent over a table/chair?
    We’ve actually never done OTK. If we did (and I want to), I would want to start out with at least my underwear on…that just seems to be a necessity for OTK, at least in my fantasies about it. 😀 I’m not tall enough, really, to bend over a table or chair; we have bent me over the edge of the bed, and we found a lovely bench in a hotel room not long ago that was the perfect height to use as a spanking bench (not to mention the fucking doggie-style that followed the spanking), which I really enjoyed. Usually, though, it’s me kneeling on the bed, head down, ass up.
  15. Would you rather your spanker have physical contact with you?
    Yes, I like a lot of contact, even if it’s just to rub my ass/back in between swats, or grab a nipple.
  16. Would you prefer to be spanked in the woods with a tree branch, bent over the hood of a car, or in a school with a ruler bent over the desk of your teacher/principal?
    No rulers! The woods sound great, but I’ll pass on the tree-branch part of it. We do, however, own a lot of classic vehicles, and I could totally get into being bent over the hood…
  17. Would you rather be a brat to your spanker to deserve a spanking or simply ask your spanker for a spanking because you know you needed it?
    I just ask for it. “Will you beat me tonight?” is a common request. He always chuckles. LOL I have never intentionally been a brat to get a spanking; there have been times when I was inadvertently  being bratty that he popped me and warned me I’d get a spanking later, but that’s pretty much just to get my attention and make me moan. 😀
  18. Have you received a spanking in the last week?
    Had a lovely spanking on Sunday morning.
  19. Would you rather be spanked for the physical pleasure or the emotional release?
    It used to be the physical pleasure; I didn’t realize the emotional release was even an aspect of it until the session a couple months ago. Now I crave the emotional part of it as well, although I haven’t cried like that again.
  20. Would you rather tell your best friends that you enjoy to be spanked or keep it a secret?
    I have one close mostly-vanilla friend who knows (hiya, hon!), and the members of my email group of women who met on SSBB years ago, and the folks here. Otherwise, private.
  21. Would you rather spanking be a lifestyle choice or just something you dabble in?
    Somewhere in between. Like I said above, we don’t have rules/protocols and so don’t do formal discipline; but we certainly do more than “dabble” in it. If I had to pick, though, it’d be lifestyle choice.
  22. Would you rather your lover be a vanilla or a spankoholic too?
    Himself is not capable of being vanilla. Honestly. LOL But it makes me very happy that he enjoys spanking me too.
  23. Would you rather be spanked by a stranger or by someone who knew you well?
    I don’t (and won’t) do BDSM with anyone except Himself. We don’t share. Unless we find a unicorn. 😉
  24. Would you rather be spanked by a despotic, mean person or by a compassionate, benevolent person?
    Compassionate, benevolent, but capable of being a hard-ass.
  25. Would you rather be talked to while you are spanked or no talking at all?
    I can do either. He’s not much of a talker during scenes or sex in general; I enjoy it greatly when he does talk, though.
  26. Would you rather get one swat at a time with pauses to let the sting set in or a continuous tanning to build up the fire?
    I like a few, then a break, then a few more.
  27. Would you rather be forced into a spanking or willingly submit into a spanking?
    I willingly submit–hell, I beg for it! But playing at a take-down/forced spanking could be very hot. That used to happen a lot more before I asked him to be my Master.
  28. Would you rather have a safe word or be pushed beyond your preconceived limits?
    I like to be pushed. I’ve only safe worded once (got close another time recently), and since we haven’t had a safe word in years, I just yelled “Safe word!” (it got the job done). I haven’t safe worded during a beating, though–it took a fucking ice cube. !!! Anyway, I’m enjoying pushing the limits, extending the boundaries of what I can take, delving into the S/M side a little.
  29. Would you rather your spanker know your spanking history or is ignorance bliss?
    This question doesn’t even make sense to me. He’s the only one who’s spanked me so it’s a moot point.
  30. Would you rather be spanked by multiple people at one time or just by one person at a time?
    Himself. Although I do have a fantasy of him spanking me while someone else is playing with me or letting me play with her….
  31. Would you rather be spanked once a day or once every few months?
    Damn, can’t there be a middle ground??? At least weekly. More would be better. Daily will never happen because he travels for work. 😦
  32. Would you rather your spanker be deeply in tune or be totally unaffected to your experiences as a spankee?
    In tune.
  33. Would you rather a closer physical relationship or a closer emotional relationship with your spanker?
    I can’t imagine not having both.
  34. Would you rather your spanker ice your bottom down after a spanking or send you to the corner to display his/her accomplishment?
    Neither! I like him to rub my ass after, and rubbing in lotion would be a nice option. Usually, though, we don’t do an “after,” we just have blazing-hot sex.
  35. Would you rather your spanker be the person you wish to live the rest of your life with (i.e. marriage) or the person you can call on when your tushy tickles?
    The rest of my life.
  36. Would you rather spanking be part of love making or not a part of love making?
    Sex.
  37. Would you rather your spanker have total control over you when you are being spanked or do you still want to have some control while you are being spanked?
    Him.
  38. Would you rather be humiliated or respected during a spanking?
    Respect.
  39. Would you rather spanking become part of a bigger BDSM alternative lifestyle or spanking just be spanking for spanking sake?
    It’s part of our BDSM (emphasis on the D/s) life.
  40. Would you rather be filmed during a spanking to share your exhibitionist naughtiness or are you too modest to show your bum to the world?
    Doesn’t matter what I would want; Himself doesn’t like to share. Also, exhibitionism (for me anyway) is much better IRL. AND I don’t want to show my bum to the world. LOL
  41. Would you rather your spanking be gentle and gradual or painful and abrupt?
    I prefer gentle and gradual, building up to mind-shattering. What I get, though, is often more toward painful and abrupt. ‘Cause, you know, Rule #1.
  42. Would you rather be defiant or fearful going into a spanking?
    Neither. I go into it with submission and anticipation.
  43. Would you rather be spanked exclusively in your own bedroom or anywhere else other than your own bedroom?
    Anywhere–as long as there’s a place for sex nearby. 🙂
  44. Would you rather be spanked exclusively on your bottom or would other places be interesting too?
    Mostly my butt, but I also enjoy breast and pussy spanking more and more, and that area right where your thighs meet your ass? We does this thing where he spanks both sides at once by basically thumping it with his forearm, it vibrates everything from my ass to my clit and is incredibly arousing.
  45. Would you rather that spanking be a surprise or something that you have to look forward to?
    I like both, but having something to look forward to gets me really hot.
  46. Would you rather that spanking be a part of role playing kinkiness or a response to events that have happened in reality?
    Well, it’s neither, really. We don’t do role-playing, and we don’t do formal discipline; it’s more just ’cause we want to.
  47. Would you rather be spanked by a male or female?
    Only Himself gets to spank me.
  48. Would you rather be cuddled or scolded after a spanking?
    Cuddled, definitely. Well, fucked first, then cuddled. Gotta have your priorities straight. 😀

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